A Brief Conversation (before a long journey)
by Built on the Horizon
Summary: Steve is the great strategist, and Bucky always knows when he's planning something.


A Brief Conversation (before a long journey)

'Hey Buck.'

The words come as Bucky leans his back against a tree, catching a break from lugging what has been nicknamed the "time machine jnr" equipment from the newly built base down to the lakeside.

They had a while to go yet, until it was set up and ready, until Steve could finally finish this bitch of a job.

Steve had been clenching and unclenching his jaw for the last half an hour. Bucky had been expecting him to break the dam and say something. He looks up and sees his friend, not looking at him, just over his shoulder.

'If you could do it all again, would you change anything?'

'I wouldn't have had that third burrito for lunch.' Bucky says, pushing off the tree. He knocks shoulders with Steve and kept going, forcing his friend to follow him, away from the science nerds and others messing with the machine.

'I meant about you.' Steve says, forcefulness entering his voice. 'Your life, SHIELD, Hydra, the whole... would you change anything?'

'Steve, you know you can't–'

'I know.' Steve interrupts. 'But would you?'

Bucky looks up at the blue sky, asking for strength. 'Steve, what happened to me, what I did, it's the worst fate I could possibly imagine. I hate it every day.'

Steve stares straight ahead as they walked, like a decision has just been made in the core of his being.

'But,' Bucky stresses, 'if I had died falling from that train, I wouldn't be here in the future with you. We wouldn't have had these years.'

'They've been shitty years.'

A bark of laughter escapes Bucky's throat. 'Worse for you.' He says wryly. 'It feels like just a few months ago I was enjoying the peace in Wakanda.'

'But was it worth it?' Steve, so stubborn, wasn't willing to let anything slide. Bucky could do nothing but sigh at the old familiar tenacity.

'I don't know. Look, if I'd broken out from them, even a year earlier, would you have gotten Pierce? The whole goddamned Hydra operation?'

Steve pauses his steps, calculating probabilities, his mouth partly open.

'See, that hesitation?' One metal finger jabs at his shoulder. 'If you've got to think about it, no way, there's no fucking way I'd put that in jeopardy.'

Bucky gets the distinct impression that they're talking through something, past something that hasn't yet been said. They're halfway round the lake now, with distance enough that the rest of the guys can't see them. Their pace had been fast, full of jittery energy that can't, won't, be resolved, but they've stopped now. Bucky centres himself with a deep breath.

'We know how this story ends, Steve. The universe is messed up, but it's here, we saved it.' A boot kicks a stray stone into the water's edge. Steve stays silent. 'The Doc said what, fourteen-?'

'Fourteen million.' Steve supplies.

'Fourteen million outcomes.' Bucky marvels at that. 'But here we are.'

He puts a hand on Steve's shoulder and squeezes it until Steve looks him in the eyes. 'I hate what happened to me. I hate what I did. But Steve, you gotta believe me. I would lay down my life to win what we just won. I would certainly go through Hydra for it. Going through those years was worth it.'

Steve sags and drops a few inches of height. It's hard to tell if a weight has been lifted or he's bearing up under a heavier one. His eyes drop too, then he turns and keeps moving down the path, shuffling now.

Bucky's face doesn't betray anything. It rarely does, these days. But he follows.

'Steve, are you okay?'

'I'm tired, Buck. I've been fighting wars my whole life.'

'Yeah, well, those first 20 years are on you.' Bucky says wryly. He throws an arm over Steve's shoulders and playfully throws his weight on down on them. Steve laughs at the joke but Bucky keeps it there as they walk. Bucky's not letting go yet. 'You'll rest soon enough.'

'And you?' Steve asks. His voice has more resonance, more gravity. The voice he uses to give the troops their orders. 'What are your plans for – the rest of the day?'

'Ah, I'm only planning to rag on Sam while he packs up the tech.' Bucky says.

'Would you... take it up?'

Bucky turns his head to Steve's, eye to eye he can't see the damage the years have worn. They could just be back in Brooklyn.

'We both know that's not me. I'm the sniper in the trees, not– ' His throat catches, 'besides. We both know it belongs to some young idealistic punk that doesn't have good sense to listen to the rules.'

'Young?' Steve laughs.

'Well, young for us.' Bucky returns.

They're getting closer to the others now. Close enough that they can see Sam messing with huge cables and mouthing off against Banner, despite being half his size.

'And you'll have Sam, and- and T'Challa-' Steve says.

'I'll be okay.'

Bucky gives his friend one last squeeze round the shoulders, one that Steve buckles under, then lets him go. They walk together, in silent company until they were just a few feet from the set up.

'Hey! Supersoldiers!' Sam calls out, dropping another huge crate at Banner's feet. 'Sure would be good to have some super strength right about now.'

Steve laughs and smiles, but before he can move on to help, Bucky softly says,

'Well, here we are.'

'What?' Steve asks, eyebrows furrowed.

'End of the line.'

Steve's eyes close slowly then squeeze shut. 'You'll stay?'

'Of course.'

Steve's eyes open and meet Bucky's. 'I'll see you here.' He promises.

And when Steve stepped onto the platform and took up both shield and hammer, when he activated the suit and stepped out of time, it felt like completion, like the end of a story, and like a rest.


End file.
